Review: San Andreas

Anything you (or anyone else) can do, the Rock can do better.  Don’t believe me?  Take a look at his resume and you will find that it is littered with projects that have re-imagined and re-engineered other films simply by turning up the volume on the action and infusing Johnson's larger than life screen presence into the plot.  The results at the box office have been nothing short of impressive.  They don’t - after all - half-jokingly refer to him as The Franchise Viagra.

The plot of Johnson’s most recent movie, San Andreas, follows three simple steps.  First, establish the credentials of the protagonist.  Second, unleash unfathomable disasters of epic proportions on an unsuspecting public.  Third, follow the protagonist as he/she sets out to save endangered family members.  If this also sounds like the plot of The Day After Tomorrow, or 2012, you would be correct.  In fact, this is the plot of nearly every disaster flick ever created.  So what makes San Andreas worth watching?

For starters, the visuals are epic.  Major kudos go to the artists involved with the special effects, who really utilized the vast majestic California landscape to paint a sweeping disaster scenario that is both horrific and breathtaking.  It helps that the scenario feels incredibly real.  Whereas most disaster films tend to depict radically accelerated climate change incidents that could only manifest on the silver screen, San Andreas fictionalizes an earthquake scenario that could occur at any moment.  That’s not to say, the film’s account is accurate and grounded in sound science (because it’s not), but the notion of it is quite real.

Still, if special effects was the sole criteria upon which the quality of a movie measured, then the second Star Wars trilogy would have surpassed the original trio.  No, it takes something more and in this case, Johnson is just that something more.  His ability to bring credibility to lines that on paper must be cringe inducing is one of his greatest skills.  It’s an ability he no doubt crafted during his WWE days, delivering over-the-top one liners to live crowds with unwavering commitment and conviction.  So when Johnson makes a daring declaration or an ill-timed comment about getting to second based while facing insurmountable odds, it allows the audience to both groan and chuckle.  And that he has a larger-than-life presence, allows the audience to suspend just enough disbelief to buy-in.

However, none of this means that San Andreas is a great movie, because ultimately it’s not.  Some might say it’s not even good.  What most could agree on is that it’s entertaining.  Watching the California coast - from the glitz of the Hollywood hills to the nouveau riche technological epicenter that is San Francisco – crumble to the ground offers a horrifically exhilarating backdrop to the perfectly melodramatic chemistry between Johnson, longtime screen veteran Carla Gugino, and Alexandra Daddario.  More simply put, it’s watching good-looking people survive or not (no spoilers!) a stunningly visual disaster.  And who could possibly decry a gluttony of eye candy.

So long story short, it’s worth a watch.  The summer slate has been and will be fairly tepid this for the remainder of 2015 and the list is short on films that really bask in being an unapologetic popcorn flick.  The visuals are massive and worth that big screen treatment and will provide you with a nice break from having to think, process, or decipher.

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2013 Vanity Post, Part 2

August 14, 2013 marks the two year anniversary for Shinsanity.com.  To mark the occasion, here is the 2^nd annual Vanity Post; a look at ten actors, appearing in films over the last twelve months, who have shown themselves to be easy on ladies' eyes.  This year’s list was comprised with a more analytical approach via a number of web analytics that are far less interesting than the people on the list.  So without further ado, here’s the top ten list for 2013:

10. NIKOLAJ COSTER-WALDAU in Mama

9. CHRIS PINE in Star Trek Into Darkness

8. NICOLAS HOULT in Warm Bodies

7. BRADLEY COOPER in The Hangover, Part III

6. DWAYNE JOHNSON in G.I. Joe: Retaliation

5. CHANNING TATUM in White House Down

4. RYAN GOSLING in The Gangster Squad

3. LEONARDO DICAPRIO in Django Unchained

2. HUGH JACKMAN in The Wolverine

1. HENRY CAVILL in Man of Steel

CLICK HERE FOR PART 1

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Review: Fast & Furious 6

All who thumbs their noses at the Fast & Furious franchise just don’t get it.  Everyone from the suits to the creative team to the cast and crew know that these films aren’t Weinstein material and that no Awards Season campaign is going to be launched for an Oscar push.  The movies have and will always be about fast cars, big action sequences, and just enough sentimentality to make you care about the characters.  Each film has gone bigger than its predecessor and at times less believable, but that’s part of the fun and why it is a billion dollar franchise for Universal.  The latest entry in the series - Fast & Furious 6, proves to be the biggest and best of the lot.

The plot finds Dwayne Johnson’s Hobbs seeking out Vin Diesel’s Toretto for helping in capturing an international arms dealer played by Luke Evans.  The hook to this deal is the reappearance of Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), Toretto’s former paramour who was thought to be deceased.  With an offer of immunity on the table, Toretto and O’Conner (Paul Walker) reassemble their team to assist Hobbs’ manhunt and to bring their lost friend Letty home.

If it sounds like heavy stuff to you, then you’re wrong.  No matter what gravitas may seem to hang over the heads of the protagonists, this film is paced far too fast to take notice.  No, what the premise actually is, is a good launching point from which to thrust the crew onto an adrenaline-infused ride.  Since director Justin Lin first jumped into the franchise with the underrated Tokyo Drift, he has done a masterful job of framing the action steering this cast away from its racing roots towards heist narratives.  The continuity between franchise and director over the last four films shows itself well in the way that Fast & Furious 6 continuously ties back to its predecessors; something ardent fans of the franchise will appreciate.

And while Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, and (to a slightly lesser extent) Dwayne Johnson get top billing, Fast 6 is very much an ensemble film.  One could in fact make the argument that some of the best scenes unfold while the big three are off camera.  Thus each member of the cast deserves a bit of ink (and an individual grade):

Vin Diesel as Dominic Toretto (B-): Diesel has played this role in just over four films spanning well over a decade.  While it seems like at times he is it on cruise control, it doesn’t affect his performance because: a.) It’s a roll that he could probably play in his sleep and b.) it’s not like the he is being tasked with playing Hamlet.

Paul Walker as Brian O’Connor (B-): The one constant throughout Walker’s career has never been his inability to act well.  There’s one role and only one role that he can play – Brian O’Connor.  This may be a product of his playing it fives times or because the writers tailor it to his persona.  Regardless, there’s not a lot of heavy lifting for him in this film and that allows him to be adequate.

Dwayne Johnson as Hobbs (B): If you tracked all the cringe worthy lines in this movie most would have to be attributed to Johnson’s Hobbs, but that is partly a byproduct of how his character is written.  He’s big; he’s militant; he’s over the top; and Johnson goes all in to portray him.  And as always, Johnson is downright entertaining.  Seriously, when was the last time you saw one of his movies and were not entertained?

Tyrese Gibson as Roman Pearce (B+): As usual, Gibson provides the comic relief and gets some of the best lines in this film and what he does with those lines is absolutely steal the show.  While no one will ever convince me that he is a good actor, I admit that he is very good at precisely the brand of shtick he brings to this franchise.

Sung Kang as Han (A-):  If Gibson is 1A in this movie, then Kang is 1B.  Try as the film does to make Vin Diesel’s and Paul Walker’s storylines serve as the heart of the movie, it’s Kang’s Han storyline that really drives that train.  Kang runs the acting gamut from comedy to physicality to emotional sensitivity and in doing so delivers the most complete performance in the movie.

Gal Gadot as Gisele (B): She’s not given the most robust role in the film but Gadot shows she is more than eye candy this time out.  She, along with Sung Kang, provides a different element to this movie, because in a franchise that constantly brings the same characters back into the same kind of fray each time out, Gadot (along with Kang) bring their characters on a journey that has a beginning, middle, and an end. 

Jordana Brewster as Mia O’Connor (C): Brewster is fairly irrelevant in this movie and serves as barely more than window dressing.

Chris Ludacris Bridges as Tej (C+): See also Jordana Brewster.  Okay, that’s a little harsh as Ludacris has his moments to shine occasionally, but in a robust cast with big personalities, his Tej falls a bit by the wayside.

Michelle Rodgiquez as Letty (C-):  I was never been a big fan of Michelle Rodriguez as an actress because I have always thought of her as a one trick pony.  Judging by her work in this film, she still is.

Luke Evans as Shaw (B-): I have seen Evans in some mediocre films (and roles) and despite this I have remained convinced that he is a very good actor.  After watching Fast 6, I am still waiting for him to prove me right.

Gina Carano as Riley (C-):  Carano is a beast.  Her MMA background and her work in Haywire says as much, but every time she speaks a line I am reminded that she is not an actresses.

So with all this being said, I will tell you that Justin Lin’s last hurrah in this franchise is a worthy send off.  The best films happen when the director loves the source material and respects its fan base and that is precisely what is happening in Fast & Furious 6.  It’s not a deep narrative and there are a few big plot holes and leaps in logic, but if you buy a ticket to this film looking for taut coherent storytelling, then you are stepping into the wrong theater.  If you are a fan of this franchise or looking for some good summer popcorn fare, then you will absolutely enjoy this movie on the big screen, as as there are some very impressive action sequences.  If you’re more of a “This is 40” or “Crazy Stupid Love” fan, then you may want to wait for this title on Netflix or maybe take a pass altogether.  And for all you hardcore Fast & Furious fans, fear not.  Number seven is already slated for a July 2014 release.

Standout Performance: Tyrese Gibson for the reasons mentioned above.  Honorable mention goes to Sung Kang.

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Review: Snitch

Judging by his recent box office success, everyone knows Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – action star.  With his imposing physicality and sharp charisma honed on a live microphone in front of a WWE crowd, he has very much earned the reputation as a franchise rehabilitator.  What gets overlooked is that Johnson has worked at his craft and turned himself into a decent actor.  In Snitch, you get a look at his improvement as he checks the fast cars and big guns at the door (for the most part), and delivers a performance that is a bit more character driven.

The plot of Snitch finds Johnson, the concerned but estranged father of an eighteen year old who mistakenly gets caught up in a drug transaction and as a result finds himself in jail and facing a ten-year sentence.  In order to reduce his son’s jail sentence, Johnson’s John Matthews strikes a deal with the District Attorney to assist in a drug bust in exchange for a reduced sentence.

As in any Dwayne Johnson movie, there are indeed gunfights and car chases, but this film is more about a father’s relationship with his son and the lengths that the father will go to protect him.  There is absolutely nothing new in this movie that you have not seen in a father/son narrative or even one centered on drug busts.  It’s pretty formulaic in both regards, but director Ric Roman Waugh does a decent job of turning out a fair B-movie action drama.  The plot and pacing remain taut as most of the fat trimmed off in the editing room.  The result is a steady growth in tension leading up to the film’s climax.  This helps offset what is for the most part an uninspired script.

Johnson’s work in this film as a concerned father is solid.  He effectively dampens his trademark over-the-top charisma to play a subdued everyman and it works just enough to make his character believable.  It’s not his most entertaining work nor is it his most impressive, but he ably carries the film on his shoulders.  I would liken his work in this film to the performances he turned in with Walking Tall and Gridiron Gang than any other in movie on his resume.  Is it a performance that saves the film from relative mediocrity?  No, but this one would by no means land him in any hall of shame. 

As for the rest of the cast, Susan Sarandon as the District Attorney is incredibly banal.  Clearly just a paycheck film for Sarandon, you almost get the feeling that she is reading her lines directly off cue cards (a la SNL).  Jon Bernthal (as an ex-con roped into helping Johnson infiltrate a drug ring) is satisfactory at best.  He seems to tap into every possible stereotype associated with his character and never elevates his performance beyond that.  Rafi Gavron, Melina Kanakaredes, and Nadine Velazquez portray various members of Johnson’s family, but none of the three do very much with the limited screen time they’ve been afforded.

The best performance from the supporting cast is delivered by Barry Pepper (as DEA Agent Cooper).  It’s not a shining example of the craft, but Pepper immerses into the role and gives it a good effort in a way that most of his fellow cast mates do not.  What his character lacks in substance and depth, he somewhat makes up for with conviction.  Still, his work is not enough to help Johnson make this film something more than just run-of-the-mill.

Ultimately, this movie has FX, TBS, TNT, et al written all over it.  Snitch is not atrocious, but there’s just not anything good enough about the movie to warrant making an effort to see it.  Even the most ardent Dwayne Johnson fan would have to admit as much.  You could literally replace this film with dozens upon dozens of titles based upon drug busts and not see any palpable difference.  Forget about this movie for now, because I am sure at some point you will run into it while flipping through the channels.  The movie should feel satisfactory, as a spur-of-the-moment viewing to offset extreme boredom.  Here’s hoping Johnson’s new movie, Fast & Furious 6 plays much better.

Not-So-Standout Performance: Benjamin Bratt.  I didn't even realize that he was in the movie.

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Review: Pain & Gain

Whoa.  That’s my first reaction to Pain & Gain.  Not because it is so amazing or because it is horribly bad, but because the movie from start to finish is all over the place.  This probably doesn’t sound like a shocking reveal since Michael Bay was the man behind the camera.  No person cinematically represents the antithesis of “less is more” to a greater extent than he of Armageddon, Bad Boys, and Transformers fame, but his latest film has a decidedly different feel then its frenetically paced predecessors.  Slower and more drawn out, the pacing allows you to take in everything that is unfolding onscreen.   But is this necessarily a good thing?

The plot of the movie is based on the real life activities of Daniel Lugo (Mark Wahlberg); a low rent con man that spends the bulk of his time cultivating his muscle more than his mind.  Driven by self-help drivel, he enlists the help of two of his fellow gym mates Adrian Doorbal and Paul Doyle (Anthony Mackie and Dwayne Johnson) to kidnap and rob local douche bag Victor Kershaw (Tony Shalhoub).  This kicks off a series of miscalculations that leads to a crime spree.

The premise seems interesting enough, but is prone to stretches where it’s just not that interesting.  For a director who is known and panned for over-the-top action sequences unfolding at breakneck speed, the pacing of the film is startlingly slow and bogged down at times in exposition.  Another problem with Bay easing on the rapid cuts and taking his foot off the gas pedal is that it allows the viewer a chance to see all the warts on his production.  And there are more than a few. 

Wart 1: The plot is too convoluted.  Three guys did a bad thing.  That’s the story, but the way Bay wants to tell it, the viewer must sit through the backstory of every peripheral character and let them take turns as a third person narrator.  This is a delicate balance to maintain and Bay lacks the directorial touch to pull it off.  As a result of this, the film’s tone and congruity are completely demolished beneath the weight of mismatched machinations. 

Wart 2: The movie is just too long.  I couldn’t help thinking that if Bay pulled this movie off at his usual pace, the movie would have been more palatable.  A typical Hollywood production has three distinct acts and while we live in a world that now detests formulaic procedure, this is one formula that works.  And when something goes awry, the average moviegoer can sense it.  Pain & Gain not only has three plodding acts, it feels like there is a fourth and fifth act added on for bad measure.  Every time the narrative builds to a crescendo, it veers off into another direction and prolongs the inevitable.

Wart 3: The character mix.  It’s tough for a film to be enjoyed without one decent character that the viewing audience can identify with or root for.  Somewhere in each film, there usually needs to be that one person the audience would like to see land on their feet when all the rubble settles.  It’s why there are cops and robbers stories instead of just robbers and robbers.  Unfortunately, this is a movie about a bunch of really bad people doing really bad things to each other.  The closest we get to a sympathetic figure is Johnson’s Paul Doyle, but Bay swings him across the spectrum of good and bad like the pendulum on the clock thus compromising his likability.

As for the work of the cast, I found most everyone to be perfectly adequate.  Wahlberg does what he does and never takes an acting risk.  He doesn’t ruin the movie, but he also doesn’t make it better. Anthony Mackie proves himself to be a capable sidekick for Wahlberg’s foibles, but none would mistake this for his best work.  Rebel Wilson, Tony Shalhoub, Rob Corddry, and Ed Harris are absolutely satisfactory and unremarkable in their supporting roles and never make a significant impact to the quality of the finished product.  Given that the cast is littered with people who know how to deliver a scene, one has to wonder if it was the nature of the plot and direction that accounts for the plethora of muted performance.

The two who shine best in Pain & Gain are Dwayne Johnson and Bar Paly.  Johnson takes some risks and offers genuine comedic moments with the brand of charisma that has made him a star in the action genre.  Few in the business today can combine action and humor better than the former WWE star.  As for Bar Paly, while it is easy to dismiss her as mere eye candy, she does a nice of parodying herself and poking fun at a character that is perhaps the most ridiculous amongst of a gallery of undesirables.

It would seem then that my takeaways from this film are that Dwayne Johnson and Bar Paly are good, Michael Bay is bad, and everyone else is in between.  But does that mean you should run out to the cinema to see Pain & Gain?  The simple answer is no.  It’s too long and not enough fun to pay the premium.  There are too many interesting movies on the horizon to waste your time with this one.  Instead, put this title on your Netflix and give it a spin in the comfort of your own home.  It may or may not entertain you, but at least you will have spent a lot less money and will get to enjoy it in the comfort of your own home.

Standout Performance: Dwayne Johnson.  He’ll never be confused with a Dustin Hoffman or a Daniel Day-Lewis, but he always keeps it interesting. 

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Review: G.I. Joe: Retaliation

If you saw G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, which starred Channing Tatum and Marlon Wayans, then you know that G.I. Joe: Retaliation really had nowhere to go but up.  To ensure that this would be the case, director Jon Chu and company enlisted the help of the franchise rehabilitator Dwayne Johnson to ensure that the sequel would do a better job stuffing Paramount’s coffers.  Going into this movie if you were looking for an intelligent plot or an action movie grounded in reality, then you probably weren’t paying attention to the marketing of this film.  No, this film is all about explosions, gunplay, and hand-to-hand combat  - nothing more nothing less - and the creative team makes no apologies for it.   As for whether it is a highly entertaining nuts-and-bolts action movie, well that is a whole other question.

The plot of the movie picks up where the last one left off with Cobra having replaced the President of the United States with a doppelganger looking to promote their terrorist agenda.  After the GI Joe unit is dealt a crippling blow via sneak attack, a small group of remaining soldiers led by Road Block (Dwayne Johnson) enlists the help of General Joe Colton (Bruce Willis) to avert global destruction.

Sound good?  Ok.  So there is a bit of a backstory to this film.  It was originally slated for release last summer, but Paramount pushed back the release to March 2013 to accommodate 3D conversion.  Or so they say.  Sources allege that the film was delayed on account of massive reshoots to not only “fix” the film, but also to beef up Channing Tatum’s role in the movie – since his star had risen significantly post The Vow, 21 Jump Street, and Magic Mike.  So did the reshoots help?  The quick answer is probably not.

The plot is tough to digest even if you go into the film expecting total fluff summer popcorn fare.  It stretches your disbelief farther than it wants to go and does so with mediocre acting.  The movie tries to be both an intimate action narrative and a story written on a global scale and that’s a bit too much to chew for this kind of film.  There’s not enough plot development, not enough attention to the written word, and not enough acting acumen in this film to pull that off.  Sure, the action sequences are good (not great), but the stuff in between prevents you from buying in.

The bright spot in this film is Dwayne Johnson.  He knows how to play this type of role and has done so in nearly all his films.  He has the imposing physicality and the  wry sarcastic delivery to add a bit of levity when the movie demands it.  Is this a new or groundbreaking turn for Johnson?  No, but it’s his bread and butter and the reason he is known as a franchise rehabilitator.  As for his partner in crime, Bruce Willis, it’s not his most egregious effort and it’s not by any means his best. I can’t say that he actually was trying in this film, but he didn’t completely fall asleep at the wheel. 

The rest of the cast is hit or miss.  D.J. Cotorona as Flint is terrible.  He has no onscreen presence and no charisma whatsoever.  The same cannot be said of his cohort Adrianne Palicki.  The camera loves her and she is oozing with personality, but unfortunately she is not ideal in this role.  The tough girl with a soft heart is something she can pull off, but when you add the military component to the package, things feel off.  Byung Hyun Lee, Ray Park, and Ray Stevenson are satisfactory as Storm Shadow, Snake Eyes, and Firefly respectively, but Jonathan Pryce and Luke Bracey (the President and Cobra Commander) leave tons to be desired.  Worst in show goes to RZA as Blind Master.  Not only is he the worst actor ever, but his mere presence in this movie knocks it down a half grade as it reminded me of the debacle that is The Man with the Iron Fist. 

Though you would never say the bar was set high for this film, it still falls painfully short of what the finished product should have been.  Expansive ninja fight scenes, established veteran action stars, and a built in mythos – this is a move that should have been much more fun.  With narratives of this ilk, we don’t ask for depth, character development, and all that much logic, but what we do expect is a raucous adrenaline rush of a film.  It fails to deliver on the latter and that makes this one a very bad rental at best.  Given that we’re only a month away from the summer movie season, better ways to satisfy your action fix loom on the horizon.

Standout Performance: Channing Tatum.  He is least culpable for this film going awry.

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Review: Journey 2: The Mysterious Island

When Journey 2: The Mysterious Island was first released I didn’t make the connection that it was a sequel to Journey to the Center of the Earth.  Brendan Fraser and pretty much everyone else from the first film were not brought back for the second installment save for Josh Hutcherson.  Before the release of The Hunger Games, I could not have picked Hutcherson out of a police line up, so his reprising the role of Sean Anderson did nothing to aid me in making a connection between the films.  I’m not exactly sure when I did finally figure it out, but now having seen the movie I wonder if any of that really matters, because it’s not a terribly good flick. 

The plot of the movie follows Hutcherson’s Sean and his stepfather Hank (played by Dwayne Johnson) as they trace a mysterious  radio signal to a mythical mysterious island born from the pages of classic adventure novels.  Along for the ride is a tour guide and his tween daughter who join Hutcherson and Johnson in their search to find Sean’s grandfather as well as a way to return home.

The best way I can describe this movie is that it is to action/adventure movies what Coors Light is to beer – very very soft.  It plays like it is geared to a younger audience that probably could care less about volcanic explosions and aerial chases.  Director Brad Peyton's film clearly panders to tween viewers by delivering  large doses of cotton candy puppy dog romance through Hutcherson and Vanessa Hudgen’s Kailani, while intermittently flashing shots of Dwayne Johnson flexing his pecs to appease all the mom's in the viewing audience.  Regardless, I am clearly not in the target demographic for this film.

With that in mind, here are the four observations I came away from the film with:

Michael Caine is a great actor.  He could read the pages of the dictionary and make it seem compelling and emotive.  On the other hand, Josh Hutcherson – he of Hunger Games and general Hollywood douchebaggery fame – is the polar opposite.  Not only can he not act, but if you could somehow quantify charisma, his score would rate just barely above that of a med school cadaver. 

As for Hutcherson’s paramour in the movie, Vanessa Hudgens, I feel like this may be the first time I have really seen her try to act as I don’t remember her saying anything of consequence in Sucker Punch.  Her performance makes me wonder why in the past she registered on anyone's radar in any way . My guess is that she may have dropped out of the same school of acting as Hutcherson.  On the bright side, neither of the two were able to upstage the  other on screen since neither know a thing about acting.

And, say what you will about Dwayne Johnson but the guy is fun to watch (even when the movie he is in absolutely stinks).  On the one hand he can play the imposing larger than life action star – the kind that doesn’t exist anymore (unless you acknowledge the cast of The Expendables which features a slew of them though long past their prime).  And on the other hand, he can be the egotistical guy in a family-friendly movie, who doesn’t quite get “it” but deep inside has a big heart and will eventually win you over with both his 1000 watt smile as well as his guitar and vocals.  Seriously, Johnson plays the guitar and sings a song in almost all his PG movies (it must be in his contract).  Hey may not be a great actor, but he is definitely a very good entertainer. 

My last thought on this film is that just because a movie is geared towards a younger audience, that shouldn't make it acceptable to have huge plot holes and to demand huge logic leaps.  Putting out a product with these kinds of issues is either born from a general disrespect for the fan base or just plain laziness.  Either way, it’s irresponsible.  In the case of this movie some of the plot issues are so egregious that a nine year old could pick it apart.

What this all means for Journey 2 is that the movie is not very good, but how bad it is really depends on the eye of the beholder.  If you’re over the age of twenty, this movie is a definite no.  No matter how much you love dHunger Games (and I guess Josh Hutcherson by extension), or how attractive you think Vanessa Hudgens and/or Dwayne Johnson are, there’s absolutely no reason for you to watch this film.  If the movie is to be viewed by someone under the age of fifteen then some entertainment value should be found.  And as for someone between those two age groups, it’s a crapshoot.  Proceed at your own risk.

Standout Performance: Dwayne Johnson gets the nod in this film because he carries most of the action sequences and the bulk of the comedic relief as well to the point where at times it almost feels like a one-man show.

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