Sunday, May 26, 2013

June 2013 Movie Guide

JUNE 7, 2013

Starring: Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Rose Byrne, John Goodman
Why You Should See It: Because you just loved Wedding Crashers so much.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because of every other movie Vaughn and Wilson have done since Wedding Crashers.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says: Game time decision.

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Lena Headey, Adelaide Kane
Why You Should See It: It's a moderately interesting premise.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because it looks like a carbon copy of The Strangers and countless other home invasion thrillers.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says: Rental.

Other theatrical releases:  Violet & Daisy, Rapture-Palooza, Much Ado About Nothing

JUNE 14, 2013 

Starring: Henry Cavill, Amy Adams, Michael Shannon, Russell Crowe, Diane Lane, Kevin Costner
Why You Should See It: Because it's a Superman movie.  'Nuff said.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because you’re a hater.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  The must see movie of the summer.

Starring: Emma Watson, Katie Chang, Israel Broussard, Leslie Mann
Why You Should See It: Because of Emma Watson and director Sophia Coppola, but really just Emma Watson.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because you saw Spring Breakers and you're afraid this is in the same vein.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  Yes to Emma Watson.

Starring: James Franco, Jonah Hill, Seth Rogen, Jay Burachel, Danny McBride, Craig Robinson, Emma Watson
Why You Should See It: Because there are a lot of funny people in this film.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because this movie wreaks of a self-indulgent, self-congratulatory project with far too many inside jokes.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  A flip of the coin.

Other theatrical releases:  Twenty Feet from Stardom, Hatchet III

JUNE 21, 2013 

Starring: John Krasinski, Steve Buscemi, John Good man, Billy Crystal, Helen Mirren
Why You Should See It: Because you just loved the other Monsters, Inc. movies.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because you’re an adult.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  No.

Starring: Brad Pitt, Mireille Enos, Matthew Fox, James Badge Dale
Why You Should See It: Because you love all things zombie related.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because of Brad Pitt's Chanel commercial and the massive rewrite and delays associated with this movie.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  Take a pass.

Other theatrical releases: A Hijacking

JUNE 28, 2013 
Starring: Sandra Bullock, Melissa McCarthy, Marlon Wayans, Taran Killam
Why You Should See It: Because the odd couple formula tends to be a winner.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because the prominent Melissa McCarthy is in a movie, the quicker her schtick wears out its welcome.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  Pick 'Em.

Starring: Channing Tatum, Jamie Foxx, Jason Clarke, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Richard Jenkins
Why You Should See It: Because you're one of ten people on the planet who think both Jamie Foxx and Channing Tatum are great actors.
Why You Should Avoid It: Because you already saw it 2 months ago when it was called Olympus Has Fallen.
And the Magic 8 Ball Says:  Not even as a rental.


Other theatrical releases:  Byzantium, I’m So Excited

1 comments:

  1. come to me son or jor-el. if you dare. KNEEL before Zod.

    ReplyDelete

 
Google+