Review: The Apparition

I have been on a horror/suspense/thriller run lately with House at the End of the Street and Paranormal Activity 4 and most recently with The Apparition and I am sorry to say that the experience has been a rapid descent into cinematic futility, and this is coming from someone who likes horror movies.  I go into these films with diminished expectations.  I know the acting is going to be sub par and that most directors are going to compensate for a lack of true tension with cheap one-off scares and excessive gore.  So my being disappointed by a horror movie, is the equivalent of coming out of McDonald’s and being disappointed with the Big Mac.  You know, it had to be really really really bad. 

The Apparition is the story of a Kelly and Ben, two young adults who move into a mostly unoccupied development in Arizona.  They immediately begin to notice odd occurrences that increase in frequency and menace.  What Kelly does not realize is that Ben once participated in an experiment to contact a deceased individual.  The rest of the movie details their attempts to uncover the who, what, and why of their circumstances.

In my estimation, that quick synopsis is better than the experience of watching the movie, and I say this not because I am pumping my own tires, but because the film is poorly written, directed, and acted.  There’s no urgency or depth, and there’s a general apathy that pervades this film that will render you a passive and ambivalent viewer to the nonsensical events onscreen.  As both writer and director of this film, I would say that all the blame falls on Todd Lincoln’s shoulders.  I wonder whose nephew he is to have gotten this gig and wonder if he has any back up plans for a career.  It’s just that bad.

As for the cast, it’s really hard to fault them because I think they gave exactly what you would expect.  I have never seen Ashley Greene’s work before, but she turned out to be precisely what I thought she would – an attractive woman with almost no acting ability whatsoever.  Sebastian Stan, as Greene’s cantankerous boyfriend, sleepwalks his way through the movie barely raising as much as an eyebrow at the paranormal activity.  And as for Tom Felton (Malfoy from Harry Potter), he is completely unremarkable in what little screen time he is given and is rendered a complete non factor.

So when you look at the production from top to bottom, it becomes immediately apparent that there are no redeeming qualities and no entertainment value to be found in this movie whatsoever.  With little tension and very few scares, the movie plays like an inconsequential series of silly events.  This movie is an absolute no and should be avoided at all costs.  Even the most ardent fan of Ashley Greene would have to admit as much.  If it’s a thrilling movie that you seek, I recommend just about every other horror movie ever made over this one.  There is a 99.9% chance you will be far more entertained.

Standout Performance: No one.

Read More

Review: Rise of the Planet of the Apes

The first time I saw the trailer for “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” the crowd at the L.A. Live AMC cinema erupted into laughter. I have to admit, that amidst the mass chortling, I myself let out a semi-audible groan. I could not fathom why 20^th Century Fox would want to revisit the franchise when this latest entry into the series would star James Franco – who is plenty competent as an actor, but incredibly difficult to take seriously after some of his well-publicized shenanigans; and because the film would inevitably evoke memories of the disaster that was Tim Burton’s foray starring Mark Wahlberg back when people were still (for good reason) referring to him as Marky Mark.

My expectations for the film were low and perhaps this was a mitigating factor in my reaction to the movie, but I found it entertaining. The first plaudit I have to lay upon the film is that the digital effects are seamless. We know that great CG can make a movie (Avatar) and bad CG can cripple one (Green Lantern), but I think CG is most effective when you are not even aware that you are watching it. And such is the case here and what makes this fete even more impressive is that the protagonist is all-digital. And this leads into my second accolade for the movie.

The next best thing I can say about the film is that James Franco is not the star. Instead he plays a supporting character, albeit an important one because the star of the film – Caesar – is a silent one. To me, this is the kind of role where Franco excels – as key figure to plot advancement without the weight of the entire film on his shoulders. As for the rest of the cast, Lithgow and Cox are solid in limited role; Tom Felton plays a cheap man’s Malfoy without the accent; and Freida Pinto serves as little more than a pretty face.

I would recommend seeing this movie at the cinema, because there are some magnificently framed shots that deserve a proper viewing and as I mentioned before, the digital effects are great. Director Rupert Wyatt does a nice job of inserting a few cookies in the prequel to place it within the “Planet of the Apes” timeline, but I suspect that it was done so with a trilogy in mind – especially so since the film has spent its first two weeks in release atop the box office.

Read More